MsMeelah
02-07-2003, 09:02 AM
this is supposed to be a joke but it's so true
************************************************** *
IN THE BEGINNING
God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and
green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live
long and healthy lives.
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-
cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with
that?"
And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her
figure that man found so fair.
And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate, nuts and
brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And
woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded
cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert. And woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil
with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak from Cracker Barrel so
big it needed its own platter. And Man gained pounds, and his bad
cholesterol went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those
extra pounds.
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not
have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man
gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip
also.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled
in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed, and created quadruple bypass surgery, angioplasties,
and stints . . . . .
And Satan created HMO's...
************************************************** *
IN THE BEGINNING
God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and
green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live
long and healthy lives.
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-
cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with
that?"
And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her
figure that man found so fair.
And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate, nuts and
brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And
woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded
cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert. And woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil
with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak from Cracker Barrel so
big it needed its own platter. And Man gained pounds, and his bad
cholesterol went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those
extra pounds.
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not
have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man
gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip
also.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled
in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed, and created quadruple bypass surgery, angioplasties,
and stints . . . . .
And Satan created HMO's...