View Full Version : How long is too Long!
Sparkles
10-31-2001, 10:45 AM
At cheerleading practice lastnight, a few us were talking about one particular couple that associated with our organization. The asked me how long they had been married and I responded they aren't. Everyone was really shocked because they have a house( or she had a house) and they also have 3 kid's together. the oldest one will be 13 yrs old in a few months. Se is so ready to get married it's not funny, but he insist on not marry her! e didn't say he didn't want to marry just not her! Seems as if there is something wrong with this picture.
My question, how long is to long. I mean they are living like a married couple, so why not. He doesn't "repect" her or the realtionship enough to take to the next level, then what is she to do? I know we all said on many ocassion there is know time limit, but damn what's up with that?!??!?!?!
shtalker
10-31-2001, 11:48 AM
She is a damn fool and that is that!!!
Now if it was hope on ethem getting married then maybe I would stick it out but this is going nowhere.
Tastey
10-31-2001, 12:01 PM
They basically are already married it's just an illegal marriage which is not much worth. But if that's all she feels she's worth or entitled too...more power to her dumb ass.
Sparkles
10-31-2001, 12:04 PM
Originally posted by Tastey+
They basically are already married it's just an illegal marriage which is not much worth. But if that's all she feels she's worth or entitled too...more power to her dumb ass.
Exactly---I didn't want to say it that way, but damn how much unerstanding can one have. It was all good in the beginning, but damn all these years later, nigga if I ain't the one, move out the way so I can get to the ONE!
OhSoPrecious
10-31-2001, 04:15 PM
In this case, there is a time limit... dammit~!! :blah: Sounds like sistah girl has already given him too much time~!! :eek: She needs to step to find someone that would want to marry her.. especially since she wants to be married~!! :rolleyes:
Life is too short. . . I tell you~!!! :hammer
SeaDuceme2
10-31-2001, 06:40 PM
if ole girl really wanted to get married, she would be married by now...at this stage in the game it taint gonna happen with ole boy.
"stupid iz as stupid does":p
ThickBodyHottie
11-01-2001, 04:06 AM
the act of entering into institution of marriage is not as grand as everyone thinks it is...
Sparkles
11-01-2001, 04:36 AM
Originally posted by ThickBodyHottie+
the act of entering into institution of marriage is not as grand as everyone thinks it is...
It should be! If your spouse is truly God sent, and you continue to pray for guidance in your marriage, your marriage should be a "GRAND" event! A lot of folks honestly get married for the wrong reason.
even with my friend, she's white and he's black but he keeps saying he doesn't want to marry a white girl although they have been together almost 14 yrs. He just doesn't want to get married, and she feels like a lot of other women who have been in no-good long term relationship--- like she deserves that for being with him so long., for all the loyalty that she as shown, but what she doesn't understand is a lot men will use the say stuff you did for them and with them against you. He has made the comment that had it done some of things he done to her to someone else, he would probably be dead now. I know he thinks she is just weak and crazy especially now because she has been going to church for some time now and don't want to continue shacking with this buster, but she said he just scared. They bot confide in me, but i don't say to much back to her because I really don't know what to say, with him I just damn nigga what you waiting on and he "ALWAYS" change to subject.
I have told him he was wrong because he has taken her "understanding and kindness and used it on her. He will say well she knew from jump I didn't want to get married and stuff like!
So what am I to say to her?!?!?!
nubianx2
11-01-2001, 06:37 AM
If he did tell her in the beginning that marriage was not an option then, she's getting what she deserves. You should never go into a situation thinking that you can change their way of thinking. Basically, she needs to either suck it up or move out and on.
djackso
11-01-2001, 06:54 AM
Originally posted by ThickBodyHottie+
the act of entering into institution of marriage is not as grand as everyone thinks it is...
On the real! If it ain't broke don't fuck it up. Just because you are the wife legally doesn't mean you are the wife for real.
Bedroomeyes
11-01-2001, 07:24 AM
Why get married now???
They've already done everything there is to do as a married couple.. If she's happy that way.. Then let it be... He knew what he was doing.. She should have put a stop to that a looong time ago.... :rolleyes:
Like my mama says... Why buy the cow if you getting the milk free.. :upto:
Let his ass try to get up and leave. I bet you the judge will rake his ass over the coals like he was married.....:(
Paper don't make your ass married....The one thing that counts a lot is weather or not they are happy together. Personally I an't living with no woman more than two to three years before I make a decision on getting married.
nubianx2
11-01-2001, 10:17 AM
Originally posted by CD+
Personally I an't living with no woman more than two to three years before I make a decision on getting married.
CD,
Why would it take your 2 to 3 years to decide if you love someone enuff to marry them?
I just think you need to be with someone for a while, get to know the person, their good points and bad points. See how they act when the shit hits the fan. Granted no man or woman is perfect, but why be hasty with a decision that in most cases will impact the rest of your life. I may know in a short time that I really love the woman, but it takes a hell of a lot more than that to make me decide to take her as my wife. I want to be able to live peacefully and happily with the woman and that my dear is the missing key stone.
adaya
11-01-2001, 12:36 PM
they have been living as if they were married all this time...I know she doesn't actually belive he's gonna change his mind and marry her when he doesn't have to! She is gonna have to realize that her loyalty does not equal his commitment. Just because she has stuck with him for the past 13 or so years doesn't mean that she has to stay there, unhappy, waiting for a wedding for the next 30 years.
Sparkles
11-27-2001, 11:24 AM
Low and behold they got married last wednes ay! Why I am still not sure, he even lied to us and told us he they didn't get the license the previous week. She has told everyone and he's told know one, don't even want to talk about it.
he were in his best friends wedding at the begginning of the month so she said the pressure was on him and his mom was also pressurring him!!!lolol
The nigga didn't asker her to marry him, he told her he was thinking about giving her his name----tisk, tisk, just keep them in your prayers.
KissableSexyShortStuff
01-18-2004, 07:46 AM
Originally posted by Sparkles
My question, how long is to long. I mean they are living like a married couple, so why not. He doesn't "repect" her or the realtionship enough to take to the next level, then what is she to do? I know we all said on many ocassion there is know time limit, but damn what's up with that?!??!?!?!
I know someone like this.... When I met her they had been together 10 years had two sons. I saw her last year and they had been together 16 years and still are not married.... Just brought a house (not sure whose names on it)....
I asked her before why not get married if you have been together for so long.... she told me whats the point.... It's just a piece of paper and a name change.. What he has I have now so why should I.....
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